i've owned you for-ever

i just moved into a new house. everything is really confusing for me right now. i've been told that i am ridiculous when it comes to my "relationships" with boys. and that i let them in too fast and too many times. i thought i was alright with how the situation played out with dan. it was done and it was final.

he should have just left me alone. he should have let me go on thinking that he is a jerk and that he never really cared about me. because if he did, he would want to see me, and to talk to me, and to do all of the things we used to do.

instead, he says he is sorry and that just makes it impossible for me to hate him. i see now we are back to the tug-of-war he plays with my heart.

so,now... i will try to be his friend. because i'll take what he gives me. and i won't tell him how much it angers me when he tells me to move on. when damn it, in order to move past something, it need to be thoroughly talked about and resolved. i am so tired of holding everything i feel inside.

:(