i feel like such a jerk. because i did this to us, i did this to you. & i can't make it alright for you because you're hurting and it's my fault. i wish that i could ignore the reasons why but i can't. i have to do what's right for me, just like you had to do what's right for you. i can't tell you what you want to hear, that i want to be with you and that everything will be perfect. i'm sorry.

its taken time. its taken effort to get here. but once its all said and done, i know that things will be alright between us. once the dust settles.

this is my life. i'm not letting myself down anymore. i'm going to see everyone for who they really are, not who i want them to be. i need to think things through, not just what feels really good at the moment. no more impulsive desires.

i am covered in skin, no one gets to come in.